Etiquette Quandaries
Suzanne Pollak
What to do if you forget to invite a good acquaintance to a large party?
OR
If your friend invites someone you have told them has done you wrong?
The Deans have been in the lab for days and have come up with solutions for these two all too common problems. We are solutioning these problems in much the same way. If you have forgotten to invite someone to a large party, or your best friend has invited your worst enemy over, the path for both these is the same and is possibly the most frustrating of all. You must do nothing. Your best friend is free to invite whoever she wants to her house, even though you think her judgment is poor. You may alter your opinion of her and undoubtedly your feelings have been hurt but you are not allowed to say anything. Similarly if you ever point out to person that you forgot to invite them, you are making them suffer twice. Dean Pollak has occasionally felt so guilty that she forgot someone, upon seeing the person she asked them why they didn’t come. She blames the mistake on the US Post Office. Dean Manigault may try to blame the problem on spam but up to now she has always kept her mouth shut and said nothing. In both these instances we feel too many words will only exasperate the problem. The Deans are women of action so this is not always easy for us, in fact sometimes it feels impossible but we feel the council is sage and correct.